A little "Australia"

Thanks for the inspiration Heartly

Please feel free to check out the Blog that inspired me to write up my dream for Camp O'Leary.
http://www.hartleysboys.com/2010/05/ftf-all-showers-lead-to-australia-by.html

Heartly,

As I was reading your blog I was getting so excited... excited for the possibilities. I want to open up a retreat some day that will act as Respite and Vacation and joyous adventure for the whole family!!! It will be Camp O'Leary (working title) but will look something like this. Three small log cabins in a secluded area, no city lights or noise; gourmet cooking including picky eater menu supplied by The Eating Game; spa packages; fishing; hunting and nature hike opportunities. There will be 3 trained counsellors on site at all times, as well as 3 special needs advocates and trainers, and 3 respite nighttime assistants. Each family will have their own small team to make their stay the best it can be. We will supply good food, fresh air, fabulous activities and the most up to date sensory rooms.

One week at a time for a price comparable to a vacation at a destination resort.

Someday I will make this happen and be able to provide a little "Australia" to those who need it most.  

Watching The Waters: RADical Resources

Watching The Waters: RADical Resources: "There are a large variety of resources out there about parenting attachment challenged children. The first thing I emphasize to any Mo..."

Pickle and Sprite

It was 8pm on New Years Eve. I picked up the phone and dialed Pat's number. She had been sick with a bad virus, I could tell it in her voice as she picked up.

"Hello?"
"Hello, Pat! It's Janice."
"Oh, Hi."
"Do you have your Sprite ready?"
"what?"
"I have my pickle, do you have your Sprite?"

I met my mom's cousin Pat for the first time when I was 8. My parents had invited Pat to spend the Christmas holiday with us. Pat's mom has just passed away, and this would be her first Christmas without her Mom. After Pat's Mom passed,  she stayed in that same apartment just up the street in Weston, Ontario, where her Mom was buried. Pat's Dad had passed away when she was my age. My Mom and Pat had gone to Teacher's college together and had always been not just cousins but good friends. I didn't know what to think of Pat, she was so tall and she had a really boisterous laugh.
When Mom and Dad decided to go out for New Year's Eve they said I would stay with Pat. That was fine with me.

It was just minutes to midnight, Pat was sitting on the couch with me and we were getting ready to watch the ball drop.
"Wait!" she blurted "what is your favourite treat?" she asked me with a huge grin on her face.
I was so taken aback all I could think to stammer was "dill pickle"
"OK, go get one and we will celebrate in style!" Pat didn't drink alcohol so she went to get a fresh Sprite from the pantry.
I was 8, it took very little to get me excited! I ran to the kitchen and came back with a dripping pickle.
"ok" she said "when the ball drops and it is officially 1980 we can clink pickle and Sprite!"
"sounds good to me!" I laughed with a toothless grin plastered across my face.

And so began a pickle and Sprite tradition that would last over 3 decades. Pat had a stroke this week and I can't talk to her, she doesn't know me or anyone else who loves her. I sure am glad I picked up the phone and dialed her number on December 31st, 2010.

Elvis had it right

Baby let me be,
your lovin' Teddy Bear
Put a chain around my neck,
and lead me anywhere
Oh let me be
Your teddy bear.

Teddy bears are comforting to the nth degree. 

I only just thought about My Teddy Bear recently 

and it made me smile. Up until I met my husband, 

I slept with a plush stuffed bear. I brought it 

everywhere with me. My Teddy Bear went with my 

to England, across Canada and back, to Encounters 

with Canada. My Teddy Bear was my rock, even 

though I only spent my sleeping hours with My Teddy 

Bear, these were the hours when I needed him the most.

He allowed me to sleep and comforted all my pain away. 

My Teddy Bear meant the world to me. I would even wash 

him only once a month. My family laughed "you still have 

that thing?" It was not a thing, it was MY Teddy Bear, I had 

always slept with one and this one was even more special 

because it was my last one. The Christmas my Mother gave 

him to me she said on the card "This is the last 

one you will get! Now you are too old!" 

I must beg to differ we are never to old for an object of 

comfort. My Teddy Bear was my item of comfort until my 

husband moved in with me and I noticed that My Bear 

would be on the floor in the morning. That had never 

happened before. Eventually, My Teddy Bear was picked 

up and put on a shelf. After my husband and I were married, 

My Teddy Bear went onto a shelf in my closet. When we 

started packing to move, My Teddy Bear  went into a 

valuables box. That was three years ago and I only just 
thought of him the other day. I love my husband but I think 
I might try and find that valuables box. My daughter is 
having another baby and I think our precious little one 
might need some comfort too.

responding to a Mom who has just given birth to a still born child

I am so sorry for your loss. It is never easy to go through the loss of child. So many will tell you that they understand and you will want to scream! How could anyone understand without having lived it?
I have lived your horror. I know what you are going through. I am feeling my own pain all over again. Even though 21 years have passed, I weep for the loss of your son and mine.
I still imagine what Shane might look like. He died at 21 weeks gestation. I had to give birth as you did to a baby that had not survived. Crushing to me was over hearing one nurse say to another "he looked so healthy and perfect, if only he could have made it." Yes, if only my son had been born on April 28th instead of that day being the horrible day of his death.
Now at 38, I have step-children and grand-babies. I wish to give you courage.  You must indeed grieve the loss of your son. I know that you will survive, I did. You have a loving family to support you.
Down the road you may want to commemorate your son. I called Shane my guardian angel because his death though terrible, in a sense allowed me to continue my education and become the person I am today. 20 years after his death I had a guardian angel tattooed on my ankle. I see my angel every day in my heart and in my mind, but now he makes me smile.

How do you handle stress?

I am watching Team Canada play the USA in IIHF World Junior Hockey. I am screaming at the TV! Calling plays and yelling at the refs.  You would not think watching my second favourite sport, my first being football, would cause stress but from my heart rate, breathing and impatience I beg to differ. What causes stress in your life and how do you handle it?

Purging is Good for the Soul

I just spent an hour in the basement sorting all the recycling that has gathered there since it has been too cold to go to the depot. Not having door to door recycling is a pain. I must say though, the basement is shaping up.
Purging is good for the soul, I have one bin for Salvation Army;  two bins to go to the garbage; 7 for recycling (cans, cardboard and paper) and all my husbands tools are organized and neat.
I hope to keep the momentum and tackle the filing in my office.
I wish you all a wonderful Sunday.

Helping is what I was born to do

I have always wanted to help people. I can remember even at 4 years of age being the official translator for the other anglophone children in my Garderie. The care givers were all French but I could speak both languages, I would help. I remember running home and telling mom "I told Jeannine that Beth wanted cookies today!" I beamed with pride knowing I had done something good. I had helped! I would like to help you.
Though my focus is adoption I have experience in many different areas.
Post a question here and I will do my best to help.
Janice *

Today, I Promise

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I have made many changes in the last year but none that will affect my family more than the one that I have made today.
Today I will make three key promises to my family.
I promise to love and accept them for who they are.
I promise to do my very best to make them proud of me.
I promise I will do my best to be healthy and happy in the new year.
I pray that I can keep my promises and be true to who I am.